Whod you bang
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
