these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
