drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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