Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
