Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
