can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
