i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Randomize
