Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I want to fling myself into the sun
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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