found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
