remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i will never coherently bang her
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
