It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
