Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
