can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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