Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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