You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize