You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
