I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
