Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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