I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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