I bet he comes in French.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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