then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize