If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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