office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
