I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
