your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize