Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
