Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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