She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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