READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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