this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
