Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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