stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
