it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Acid is not a monday night drug
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
