Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
