I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
