Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize