ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
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