oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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