Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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