don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Randomize
