I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
How's work?
Spinning.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
