I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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