the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
