Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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