I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
