Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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