if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
