her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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