Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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