blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize