I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
